I went for my second run in ages this morning. Early sun lifting mist off the nature reserve, leaving naked branches in silhouette against the whitewashed vegetation. The first shoots of daffodils poking up from the brown of last year’s fallen leaves.
Birds singing obscenities to each other.
And I thought to myself – I like this, why haven’t I run for so long?
For a while it was anaemia (I couldn’t understand why I was getting so out of breath). But, I guess it was mostly despondency. I didn’t feel like I was fast enough. Didn’t think I was losing any weight.
I’d lost my mojo.
And with most high-street retailers not selling fitness gear for plus size women and some running apps not acknowledging someone seriously runs at my speed, it’s no wonder.
Am I just too fat and slow to be a serious runner? Does running do my overweight body any good, or am I just slogging my lumbering guts out for nothing?
Sound familiar? From talking to people on Facebook, my friends and from what I’ve read, I’m relieved to know it’s a common thing.
So, consider this.
A US study into women’s heart health found that lack of strenuous exercise was more likely to lead to heart disease and heart attack than being overweight alone (read my ramblings about it here).
Think about it.
If the numbers on the scale or the stopwatch are an impediment to my body getting more efficient at pumping life-giving blood around itself, are they helpful?
I think not.
So, scales and running app back in the cupboard of sadness where they belong, I put my running shoes on this morning and enjoyed a bit of spring sunshine.
And I got thinking about the mate of mine who I met in the supermarket the other day. She’s a plus-size honey and she’s been working with a personal trainer. Oh my, she looks sweet.
“But I’ve fallen off the wagon” she said.
“Doesn’t matter, just as long as you get back on it” I replied. I think I was talking to myself.
Weight, speed, whatever – all to one side for now. They’re not helping.
I’m doing this for my heart.
Fancy taking up running but don’t know where to start? Check out my top ten tips for plus size running. Good luck.